Bubba died in a terrible fire, and his body was burned so badly that the morgue needed someone to identify him.

Since Bubba had no close family nearby, they called his two best friends, Darryl and Gary. The three of them had been inseparable for years. Wherever Bubba went, Darryl and Gary were usually right behind him.

Darryl arrived first. The mortician pulled back the sheet and said, “Is this your friend?”

Darryl looked closely and frowned. “Well, his face is burned pretty bad. You better roll him over.”

The mortician thought that was odd, but did as he asked.

Darryl studied the body for a moment, then shook his head. “Nope. That ain’t Bubba.”

Confused, the mortician brought in Gary.

Gary looked at the body and said, “Yeah, he’s burned up pretty bad. Better roll him over.”

Again, the mortician rolled the body over.

Gary took one look and said, “Nope. That ain’t Bubba either.”

The mortician finally asked, “How can you both be so sure?”

Gary said, “Because Bubba had two assholes.”

The mortician stared at him. “Two?”

Gary nodded. “Yup. I never saw them myself, but everybody in town knew it.”

“How?”

Gary replied:

“Every time we walked into town, people would say, ‘Here comes Bubba with those two assholes!’