A frustrated housewife decided it was time to bring some excitement back into her marriage.

Their romantic life had become so dull that even the houseplants seemed bored, so one afternoon she went shopping and bought a daring pair of crotchless panties. That evening, she cooked her husband’s favorite dinner, lit a few candles, and poured herself a glass of wine for courage.

After dinner, she changed into a short, revealing skirt, put on the new panties, and sat gracefully on the sofa directly across from her husband, who was relaxing in his favorite chair.

At first, he barely noticed anything. He just stared at the television like it held the secrets of the universe.

So she poured another glass of wine.

Then another.

Finally, when she felt the moment was right, she leaned back, smiled seductively, and slowly uncrossed her legs just enough for him to notice.

At last, his eyes drifted away from the TV and focused exactly where she wanted them to.

He blinked, leaned forward, and asked carefully, “Are you wearing crotchless panties?”

She smiled coyly and whispered, “Y-e-s…”

Her husband sighed with relief and said,

“Thank God. I thought you were sitting on the cat.”

He never saw the glass of wine coming.