A man and his wife are at a high school reunion and the husband keeps staring at a gorgeous drunken lady swigging her gin at a nearby table, glass after glass.
His wife turns to him and asks, “Do you know her?” “Yes,” sighs the husband. She’s my ex-wife. She took to drinking right after we divorced seven years ago, and I hear she hasn’t been sober since.” “My God!” says the wife.
“Who would think a person could go on celebrating for that long?”
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for…
A man buys a paint factory in a small town. He visits the local volunteer fire department to see for himself if they’d be able to handle…
A cop pulls over an old lady driving very slowly on the highway and sees three other old ladies in the car, all of whom are terrified….
A bald eagle decides to stop by a small lake to get a drink. As he’s drinking another bald eagle lands next to him. He looks at…
A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition….
A blonde calls out to a man on the street: “Excuse me, what time is it now?” “It is 4:35.” “That is strange.” “What is?” “Every time…