A man was called to testify at the IRS, and not knowing what to wear, he asked his accountant for advice.

Accountant: “Dress in your shabbiest clothes. Let them think you’re broke.”

Then, he asked his lawyer the same question and got the opposite advice.

Lawyer: “Don’t let them intimidate you! Wear your sharpest suit and tie.”

Now totally confused, the man went to his priest for guidance. The priest smiled and said, “Let me tell you a story.”

“A young woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. Her mother said, ‘Wear a long, heavy flannel nightgown that covers everything up to your neck.’ But when she asked her best friend, she got a different answer: ‘Wear your sexiest negligee, with a V-neck down to your navel.’”

The man frowned. “What does this have to do with my IRS problem?!”

The priest sighed. “My son, it doesn’t matter what you wear… you’re still gonna get screwed!”