Gabriel’s Horn or Heaven Key?

It was time for Father John’s Saturday night bath and the young nun, Sister Magdalene, had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed:

Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Father John’s nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to do and pray.
The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the Saturday night bath had gone.

“Oh, sister.” Said the young nun dreamily. “I’ve been Saved.”
“Saved? And how did that come about?” Asked the old nun.

“Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to wash him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between his legs where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven.”

“Did he?” Said the old nun curiously.
Sister Magdalene continued. “And Father John said that if The Key to Heaven fits my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I would be assured salvation and eternal peace. And then, Father John guided his Key to Heaven into my lock.”
“Is that a fact?” Said the old nun even more curiously.

“At first it hurt terribly, but Father John said the pathway to salvation was often painful and that the glory of God would soon swell my Heart with ecstasy. And it did, it felt so good being saved.”

“That wicked old bastard.” Said the old nun. “He told me it was Gabriel’s Horn and I’ve been blowing it for 40 years!”

Views: 0

Related Posts

Story: A soldier approached a nun

Out of breath, he asked, “Please, may I hide under your skirt? I’ll explain later.” The nun agreed… A moment later two Military Police ran up and…

Story: 100 years old

The doctor asked the man, “Do you smoke or drink?” “No,” he replied. “I’ve never done either.” “Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or fool around with…

Story: Benjamin was in jail

Benjamin was in jail serving 30 years for robbing banks. After serving about 12 years he is notified that his Uncle from Ludhiana has died and left…

Story: A married couple were asleep

A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (a blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said,…

Story: A dentist told a mother

A dentist told a mother, “I’m sorry madam, but I’ll have to charge you a $100 for pulling your boy’s tooth.” The mother exclaimed, “A $100! You…

Story: For Men Only

A female alcoholic walks into a bar that has a sign marked: “For Men Only.” “I’m sorry, ma’am,” says the bartender. “We only serve men in this…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *