Four older women are sitting around playing Bridge. The first lady says, “You know girls, I have known you all a long time and there is something I must get off my chest. I am a kleptomaniac. But, don’t worry, I have never stolen from you and I never will; we have been friends for too long.”

The second Lady says, “Well since we are having true confessions here, I must get something off my chest too. I am a nymphomaniac. But don’t worry, I have never made a play for your husbands. They don’t interest me and never will; we have been friends for too long.

“Well,” says the third lady, “I, too, must confess something. I am a lesbian. But do not worry, I will not bother you. You are not my type. We have been friends too long for me to ruin our friendship.

”The fourth lady stands up, and says, “I have a confession to make also. I am an uncontrollable gossip, and I have some phone calls to make!”