When we are dating, we often go out on the town and do things that help to keep life interesting. Unfortunately, those days often tend to die down after we get married, and we may find ourselves in a rut.

In the following joke, a husband and wife decide to go out on a nice date, but they also know that it is important to have the house looked after. In their haste, they do something that ends up shocking the taxi driver and potentially ruining the evening.

My husband and I were dressed and ready to go out for a lovely evening of dinner and theatre.

Having been burgled in the past, we turned on a ‘night light’ and the answering machine then put the cat in the backyard.

When our cab arrived, we walked out our front door, and our rather tubby cat scooted between our legs inside, then ran up the stairs. Because our cat likes to chase our budgie, we really didn’t want to leave them unchaperoned so my husband ran inside to retrieve her and put her in the backyard again.

Because I didn’t want the taxi driver to know our house was going to be empty all evening, I explained to him that my husband would be out momentarily as he was just bidding goodnight to my mother.

A few minutes later, he got into the cab all hot and bothered and said (to my growing horror and amusement) as the cab pulled away.

“Sorry it took so long, but the stupid b*tch was hiding under the bed, and I had to poke her arse with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck and wrapped her in a blanket so she wouldn’t scratch me like she did last time. But it worked! I hauled her fat arse down the stairs and threw her into the backyard. She had better not s*it in the vegetable garden again.”

The silence in the taxi was deafening…