An Irishman, stranded on a deserted island for over 10 years, finally spotted a tiny dot on the horizon. 

He thought to himself, “It’s certainly not a ship.”
As it got closer, he ruled out a boat… then a raft.

Suddenly, out of the surf strode a figure in a black wetsuit. She set aside her scuba gear, unzipped the top, and revealed a drop-dead gorgeous blonde. 

Shaking out her hair, she walked up to the stunned Irishman and asked,
“Tell me… how long has it been since you’ve had a good cigar?”

“Ten years,” he replied in amazement.

She unzipped a waterproof pocket on her sleeve and pulled out a fresh pack of cigars and a lighter. 
He lit one, took a long drag, and sighed,
“Faith and begorrah… I’d forgotten how good a smoke can be!”

Then she asked,
“And how long has it been since you’ve had a drop of good Bushmills Irish Whiskey?” 

“T-ten years,” he stammered.

She reached into another pocket, pulled out a flask, and handed it to him.
He took a long drink and shouted,
“’Tis nectar of the gods! Absolutely fantastic!”

Then the blonde slowly began to unzip the front of her wetsuit, looked him straight in the eye, and asked,
“And how long has it been since you played around?” 

With tears in his eyes, the Irishman fell to his knees and cried,
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph… don’t tell me you’ve got golf clubs in there too!!”